


Bored

by leprechaungreen



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-14
Updated: 2016-03-14
Packaged: 2018-05-26 18:01:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6249907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leprechaungreen/pseuds/leprechaungreen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"As human beings, as creatures on this earth, we are always learning.  Every second, of every minute, of every day.  Like right now.<br/>Right now I’m learning that you don’t love me."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bored

As human beings, as creatures on this earth, we are always learning. Every second, of every minute, of every day. Like right now.  
Right now I’m learning that you don’t love me.  
I can see it in your eyes, how they dart to look anywhere but my own. In your shoulders, how tense they are whenever I speak.  
Mostly, though, I’m not searching for it. I don’t have to, because you’re outright telling me.  
Your fingers don’t twitch when I am close. I ask you what drink I should order and you tell me you have no idea. When I turn my head to see if my drink’s ready you aren’t staring at me when I look back. You don’t steal a sip when it slides over and you give me a weird look when I pull out an ice cube and suck on it.  
You rarely blink and your sentences, few and far between, are blunt and dry, I cannot hear what you are thinking in your tone and I cannot see what you hear me say when I respond. My hand is on my lap, you are not holding it.  
I say I have to go to the bathroom, you do not deign to respond. I adjust my dress and fix my my makeup. The bags under my eyes are visible. It just makes them look more dull.  
When I come back, you have turned. You are talking with a girl. I know you, I see that you’re flirting, I know because you’re rubbing the bar with a finger. You see me coming and stand up straighter, you had been leaning in. You don’t attempt to remove her hand from your arm. She does that herself when she sees me.  
You’re dragging your finger around the rim of your drink, you’re bored. You’re running a hand through your hair, you’re bored. You’re scratching your collarbone, you’re bored, you’re rubbing your thigh, you’re bored, you’re stretching and you’re bored, you’re tugging your shirt and you’re bored, bored, bored, bored, you’re fucking bored-  
You back away when I get off the stool, there is no emotion on your face when I say that I’m leaving, that I’m going back to the apartment. I don’t say anything when I walk away because I know you won’t hear me, not really.  
I don’t cry on the ride, when my friend picks me up. She doesn’t ask, because she doesn’t know.  
I don’t cry when the doorman lets me in. He doesn’t ask, because he knows.  
I don’t cry when I look myself in the mirror. I ask myself if there’s something wrong. I ask because I know. There’s something wrong here.  
I know that you don’t love me. I can see it.  
What hurts is that you used to.  
And that I used to care.

**Author's Note:**

> You should know, if you're confused, then I am infinitely moreso.


End file.
